


DAVE HAS BURNED EVERY SINGLE BRIDGE ON THIS ADVENTURE

by itsrose



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Animal Abuse, Doomed Timeline(s) (Homestuck), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Rape Culture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:08:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22688269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsrose/pseuds/itsrose
Summary: AND I'M BEGINNING TO SUSPECT HE DOESN'T EVEN *WANT* TO FIND THE TREASURED GOLDEN LOTUS GEMSTONE OF SHANGRI-LA
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29





	DAVE HAS BURNED EVERY SINGLE BRIDGE ON THIS ADVENTURE

**Author's Note:**

  * For [itsdave](https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsdave/gifts).



DAVE: what karkat hey dont say that  
DAVE: i am giving it my all  
DAVE: i am *dedicated* to this mission you know that  
DAVE: since birth  
DAVE: ive been at it since i was only a wee lad traipsing through the streets just looking for a little scrumpet  
DAVE: you know me i am all about the sticky dumpus whatever diamond of xanadu  
DAVE: its the only thing wed talk about in abandoned brick orphan hideout  
KARKAT: YOU WEREN'T AN ORPHAN. YOU HAVE A BREAKDOWN ABOUT YOUR GOD DAMN UPBRINGING EVERY FIVE MINUTES.  
DAVE: yeah well  
DAVE: you know me  
KARKAT: I THOUGHT I KNEW YOU.  
KARKAT: BUT SINCE WE STARTED THIS GRAND ADVENTURE YOU'VE SOUGHT OUT RUNNING HEADFIRST INTO EVERY SINGLE POTENTIAL OBSTACLE IN OUR WAY.  
KARKAT: YOU'VE TAKEN EVERY DISTRACTION PRESENTED TO US.  
KARKAT: WHY AM I STILL HERE.  
KARKAT: BECAUSE I AM AN IDIOT AND STILL HAVE ONE TINY SPECK OF HOPE THAT YOU'LL COME TO YOUR SENSES AND NOT ATTACK THAT PANTHER WITH YOUR BARE HANDS.  
DAVE: i dunno karkat that panther is lookin  
DAVE: extra attackable  
KEKTAR: DO NOT EVEN, STRIDER.  
DAVE: ehhhhhh ahhhhhh hmmmm  
DAVE: just look at it  
DAVE: standing there in the jungle  
DAVE: just waiting to be attacked you know  
DAVE: it'll like it itll have fun  
DAVE: you know we'll rumble and tumble a while itll be great  
DAVE: itll be great fun  
DAVE: me and the panther just fighting in the woods  
KASKAT: DAVE.  
KASKAT: DO NOT.  
KATKAT: ATTACK.  
KATKAT: THAT PANTHER.  
DAVE: just rollin around gettin up and having a wicked staredown  
DAVE: its all squinting and im all squinting looking back and weve got our fists OUT we are READY at the drop of a hat to unleash some serious karkate action  
DAVE: karate  
DAVE: whuppow  
DAVE: pijjam  
KARKAT: DAVE.  
KARKAT: DON'T DO THIS.  
DAVE: the deer or whatever it is im fighting is all doing a move  
KARKAT: IT'S A PANTHER. YOU'RE LOOKING AT A PANTHER IN THE FOREST RIGHT NOW.  
DAVE: yeah and its doing a move at me and im just watching from the other side of the clearing and it finishes and then i start ripping out a sweet move of my own  
DAVE: like an awesome spinning kick in the air  
DAVE: through the air  
DAVE: and then it does another move while i watch and its even better than the others  
DAVE: i give it a tiny nod of respect and then whip out my super secret move  
DAVE: and then it gives a tiny nod of respect back and runs at me  
DAVE: bam arms and tails are flying and then i kick its panther ass  
DAVE: wham  
DAVE: get pitted  
KARKAT: PLEASE DON'T DO THAT.  
DAVE: ok gonna do it  
KARKAT: NO! NO! DON'T DO THAT DAVE.  
DAVE: rararararararararararararararararara  
KARKAT: FUCK! SHIT! NOW WE'LL NEVER GAIN FAVOR WITH THE ELVES IN THE PANTHER CITY OF GORDSMERE!!  


**Author's Note:**

> THEY GOT LOST BUT MADE IT BACK TO THE TAVERN BY NIGHTFALL


End file.
